‘Heidi’ channels feminist ideals

Sierra Rickards hopes to project the struggles of women artists and wishes to change the portrayal of women in art through her performance in Mt. Hood’s student directed production of “The Heidi Chronicles.”

Rickards is playing the part of Heidi Holland, the protagonist in the play. “She’s an art historian, and an essayist and a feminist,” said Rickards. “She is just really focusing on representing women in the art world where (they weren’t) as represented at the time, and still actually (aren’t) represented as fully as women would like to be.”

Rickards auditioned for the part after her friend Shelby Jones was chosen to direct the play. Rickards said that she cried while reading one of the monologues in the play, and ended up getting the part.

“I just didn’t necessarily think that I had the acting chops for it, or I was the right look for Heidi,” said Rickards. “I’m of a really ethnic background (and) ethnicity wasn’t as prominent in the wealthier circles during that time, so I was like, ‘Probably gonna be a girl who is not ethnic’ ” she said of her chances to win the  role.

The similarities between Heidi’s and Rickards’s personalities are not missed by Rickards. “It’s creepy, how well I connect to her. A lot of the things that she says, I feel directly correlate to my life. She’s very passionate about art, as am I,” she said. “I’m kind of, like, big on female artwork, and her relationship with her friends, I find that I have friends similar to her friends in the show.”

There are differences between Heidi and Rickards that the actress has to overcome. “I have to work on being more vulnerable because I tend to shove all my emotions down,” said Rickards. “With Heidi, it’s very important that I feel everything that happens to her and really go into how I feel as a person about certain things.”

Rickards said that there is a scene in the play where Heidi has a four-page monologue that is something women would universally relate to. “It’s just interesting because it’s the type of monologue that every female can connect to if they think of it in the way it’s supposed to be thought of.

“That was really difficult — to just let myself feel all of that emotion, ’cause it’s stuff you don’t wanna think about,” she said. “There’s always some sort of competition between women anywhere, whether you’re not directly competing with them — that’s what (the) monologue is about and realizing that, basically as a woman, you’re always competing.

The scene packs a punch, Rickards said.

“It’s crazy how much feeling is behind it, ’cause you just end up crying. Figuring out how to deal with my emotions, (at a) level that I can still act with feeling like that — it’s really difficult,” she said.

Allowing herself to display emotions in a very open way is a challenge for Rickards. “I won’t talk about how I’m really feeling. I mean, I’m a girl — there’s always subtext, but you just have to fight it and be like ‘Uh, you need to talk about how I feel about life,’ and that’s definitely a struggle being a woman, because you are taught to keep everything very in check.”

Rickards wants people to see the show so they will understand that they will eventually reach their desired goals, even though there are hardships.

“I think that’s really inspirational as a woman to realize that even if you are constantly losing, or you may not feel like you’re the best, or you may feel like it’s a whole competition with a ton of people, and you feel like you’re never gonna win, there’s always a chance that you’re going to find your goals and meet your goals in life — even if they don’t turn out like you expected (them) to.”

“The Heidi Chronicles” opens Thursday at 7:30 p.m. in the Studio Theatre, and continues May 30 and 31. Tickets available at mhcc.edu/theatre and cost $5.