The Advocate’s astrological gifting guide

December 3, 2015Uncategorized0

Here at the Advocate, we take our astrological signs very seriously. Are you unsure about what to gift that special someone for the holidays? Fear not! Everyone has a birthday, and if you can sneakily (or not so sneakily) figure out what day it falls near, you can find the perfect gift for anyone based on their sign. This guide was brought to you by a gallon of Boyd’s coffee, Johnny Cash’s Christmas album, the soft and cozy embrace of the current PNW weather, and a perfectly rolled joint from our graphic design team. Enjoy!

Aquarians don’t just cope well with change, they thrive on it! There is nothing they love more than trying something new. Which brings us to the Google Cardboard. It’s the new, cutting edge virtual reality viewer for the UBER-trendy and eco-conscious. You can download FREE VR videos on any smartphone! It’s a 3-D experience that will rock their world! $5 on Amazon.

The Pisces in your life loves to dream – they are the sensual romantic of the zodiac and enjoy anything that treats their senses. As long as it tastes/sounds/feels/smells beautiful, it’s sure to be a hit. Speaking of hits, why not make them feel like a baller with a month of PREMIUM Spotify? They can experience a whole new world of sounds and get custom recommendations based on music they already like! Spotify Gift Card – $10.

Fiery Aries folks have short(ish) fuses and sometimes even shorter attention spans, which generally means they get really fired up about surprises. Forget about fancy wrapping – they only care about what’s inside and love a new activity over yet another material possession. Surprise them with tickets to Portland’s Lloyd Center skating rink – they can release all that pent-up ram energy and you look like the coolest friend ever. $14.50 through Dec. 29 ($3.50 skate rental).

When choosing a Taurus gift, don’t rush. They adore the finer things in life, like rich mahogany tabletops and specialty coffee that costs more than your firstborn, and they’ll know if you thought your gift through, or not. But you don’t have to break the bank to please these strong personalities! The Taurus chakra is the throat, and winter’s a great time to get them a specialized coffee/tea mug (most people don’t have even one). Shared a special memory? Insert that puppy into VistaPrint and you’ve got a 100% specialized gift. $8.99 on Vistaprint.com (not including shipping).

Gemini people are by far the easiest to find gifts for – they love almost anything! The twins are the communicators of the zodiac and can carry a conversation with anyone. The Gemini like to keep track of everything they learn, and they thrive on organization (due to being rather forgetful). We suggest a rechargeable power bank (brightly colored so they don’t lose it) for their cell phone, which is always dying. $5-10 (most grocery stores).

The Cancer loves presentation as much as the gift itself. They will be most appreciative of a gift you’ve made yourself. To them, this shows just how much you care about them and their feelings. If you’re like most people and freeze at the thought of knitting a sweater or spending a day reading a birdhouse manual, fear not. They are homebodies! Two Words: Printable Art. Find a killer frame at Goodwill, a cool design/photo that fits their style, and head below the school bellows to the MHCC print shop. Voila! $5-$10 (depending on frame).

The fiery, flamboyant Leo in your life needs a dramatic, colorful gift that reflects their personality and shows off their edgy, theatrical side. All the better if they can WEAR it! Whatever it is, make sure it isn’t subtle. A flashy red scarf (gender-neutral) is always a great choice. $10 at Target.

Practical Virgo loves a great gift as much as anyone, but an accessory that makes their life easier will be the golden ticket. They’re also pretty quirky, so it needs to be just a little out of the ordinary. If they’re into tech, pick up one of those cool, retro-inspired earphone-splitters ($5 at Forever 21) or a 4-Port USB Hub shaped like an octopus ($5 on Amazon). If not, an extra-handy multi-tool ($6 on Cabelas.com).

The airy Libra is a creature of intellect and imagination who generally feels a strong pull towards natural textures, peaceful settings, and harmonious spaces. Their energy spirals outward, however, so finding them something that rejuvenates their giving soul will be the best way to show you care. Rather than a chintzy pre-packaged bath set, create your own concoctions with a personalized sugar scrub. We like coffee grounds in ours (it exfoliates!) ($15 for sugar, coconut oil, and assorted ‘flavorings’, mason jar).

When looking for a gift for the murky, mysterious Scorpio, find ways to make it intriguing. These introverts will not appreciate bright and sunny; they love the metaphysical, the strange, the dark and anything black! They also enjoy the psychoactive – if they’re over 21, consider visiting a local dispensary and picking them up a joint of nice Sativa ($7-12). Not their speed? Consider a tape recorder, so they can visit the local cemetery to try their hand at ghost-hunting or catching an impromptu confession. ($13.99 at RadioShack).

The Sagittarius in your life is a lover of adventure and travel, even if it’s an armchair vacation. They love to stay active, and adore the exotic. National Geographic is offering an entire YEAR of magazine subscriptions for only $12. They can also be a bit accident-prone, so it’s not a bad idea to give them a first-aid kit to take along with them on their more local journeys. ($10-12 at Walgreens)

The Capricorn would rather have something they can use than something they’ll need to dust, and they are sticklers for physical comfort (read: they hate being cold). This would be the perfect sign to gift that pair of woolen mittens – chances are they’ll love you for it. Soft, fuzzy scarves and beanies are perfect, also. ($10-15, most places). As long as it’s natural materials, you’re in the clear.